The Importance of Dignity (Audio)

ITP #15: October already! It’s hard to believe that the holidays are just around the corner. In this episode, Anush takes a look at extending a hand up to the homeless population, upholding dignity, and giving from the heart.
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The Importance of Dignity

The approach of October 1 at my day job is always a time of craziness, and that made for a really trying week.  It's hard to believe that September is already over, and you know that the next 3 months are going to fly by.  Here in the U.S., the stores have a couple aisles side-by-side devoted to the seasonal stuff.  It's a combination of Halloween costumes and candy/Thanksgiving turkeys and fall leaf decor and Christmas decorations!  And that's really how it's going to come and go in a flash!  It seems like just a few months ago that I was writing about my daughter's wedding, and in just a couple weeks, she and Eric will be celebrating their 1st anniversary.  Already!

This time of year marks the beginning of the approaching holiday season.  In general, people tend to be a little more generous during this time of year...usually.  I know that the economic downturn, however, has made it stressful on many of us.  It seems that the bills are always there, no matter what.  And then life throws us a few curveballs along the way:  the car breaks down (we know what that's about!), you've got to take an unexpected trip, medical expenses, etc.  It's easy for us to get stressed out about finances.  And then the Christmas season is just around the corner and with it comes the gift giving madness...you know how that goes.

As difficult as it does seem to get at times though, it's not as bad as it could be.  We still have a roof over our heads, food in the fridge, clothing on our backs, and a bed to sleep in at night.  At least most of us do.  And this week, I wanted to talk about the part of our population that doesn't have these blessings.  The homeless population.

If you've been following my blog or listening to my podcast, you know that I am involved in our In His Shoes homeless outreach.  I am in tune to this vulnerable population...not only because I work downtown, but because I was brought up with parents that cared about them as well.   For the past 6 years, we have been providing meals and clothing to the homeless population on L.A's streets in the skid row area on a monthly basis.  And recently we have partnered with Glendale's homeless shelter and we are now providing homecooked meals to the residents there.   This gives us the opportunity to not only have fun cooking for them and watching them enjoy our efforts, but it also gives us a chance to sit down with them, talk to them, and to understand that they are no different than we are....except that we have support systems, and they don't.

Today, though, I wanted to write about those that don't even have the four walls of the shelter to keep them warm and dry.  I write about those that are living on the streets because I want to share some things that I've witnessed over these past weeks, months....years.  Especially as it deals with dignity.

I witnessed something this past Monday morning that is still pulling at my heart today, nearly a week later.  I take the bus into downtown L.A.  And as I got off at my stop, there was a group of us standing at the signal waiting for it to turn green.  I noticed a woman about 20 feet away.  She looked poor, though I can't really tell you she was homeless.  I could tell she had tried very hard to put herself together.  She wore pants and a shirt.  They were clean but very worn.  Her hair was combed to the side, her shoes had holes.  I could tell she was thinking about something.  I understood from her posture and from working with the homeless that she was trying to get the courage to ask for help.  She came closer.  Right next to me was a beautiful woman, dressed to the "t".  Shoes, clothes, make up, matching bag, jewelry were all perfect and her hair was layered and flat ironed.  She was very well put together.  The poor woman approached her.  I heard her start the conversation which went something like this:  "Ma'am, good morning.  I love how you have your hair.  The way it's layered.  It looks so lovely on you....."  Okay, now if someone said this to you, would you not have the courtesy to say, "Thank you"?  I was really taken aback when the pretty woman stopped this woman in mid-sentence, held out her hand like a policeman stopping traffic and said, "Stop!  If you're going to ask me for money, I don't have any!"  If you could see the poor woman's expression of horror when she was confronted this way.  I heard her mumble something about needing only 35 cents...and then the poor woman apologized.    I was so sickened, and saddened by this.  I wanted to follow her as she walked off and give her money, buy her food....but I couldn't because at that moment that's not what she needed.   she had lost her dignity.  I know how mortified she felt at the rich woman's response. She had mustered up all the courage she had to approach this woman in the first place, and then to be rejected so terribly.  I couldn't make it worse by showing her that I had heard the whole thing. I watched her gather herself together and walk away.

You've heard me talk about my homeless friend Bob.  I learned a long time ago to allow him to give back to me as well  Over the course of the 5 or so years that I have had the pleasure of knowing him, he has given me so much:  a penny with a hole stamped in it; a box with an Alaskan fish painted on it; a bag of nuts; a piece of candy; a white chocolate egg....and most importantly his wonderful friendship.  When he first offered to share some candy with me, I thanked him and refused.  But I noticed how that made him feel.  When you're homeless, people avoid you.  It's a given that you're going to ask for help.  You already feel invisible as people avoid you, walk around you, don't acknowledge your presence.   The simple act of talking to someone, and sharing something you own with them, makes you feel like you too have something to share. Like you too can contribute to the friendship.  One of the things that Bob likes most, more than donations or food or money, is when people stop and talk to him.  If you call him by name, he's your friend for life.    And so I accept Bob's gifts of friendship.   And I cherish them.  Because here is someone who has so little.  Everything he owns is packed onto his wheelchair...yet he has so much, that he wants to share it with me.  I am touched by his friendship.  Bob has got dignity!

A few years ago, I witnessed this dignity in a homeless man on one of our Skid Row outreaches.
We had pulled up to our first stop on 4th Street and San Pedro.  There was a small encampment of people living in boxes (if they were lucky to have a box) or on the sidewalk.  It was a cold Fall night, and a man came up and asked if I would have a pair of shoes for him.  He said that he had shoes, and if we didn't have any, that was fine. But he thought he'd ask.  The sidewalk had puddles from the rain that day, and the man's shoes were canvas and looked a bit damp.  I dug around and found a pair of leather high top shoes.  I held them up and asked if he could use them.  He looked at them.  He smiled.  He said they looked great.  He hoped they fit.  He said he wouldn't take them if they didn't fit.  And he took the pair of socks I offered him and set about to try them on.  While he was trying them, I asked if he could use some soup, an emergency blanket?  A rain poncho? "I'm good," he said.  "I have everything I need, but thank you."  

The shoes fit.  He was smiling....and stomping around.  Then he did something I will always remember.  He handed me his canvas shoes, and said, "I'll donate these to you.  They're worn, but someone else can make some use of them.  Oh, and I'd like to give you a donation."  When I thanked him but said it wasn't necessary, he said, "Oh, no, I know it's not necessary, but I'd like to.  It's important that we help one another.  And your group is here helping us."  He pulled out two rumpled dollar bills from his pocket and handed it to me with thanks.  I was so touched.  He looked like all he had was the clothing on his back and the new shoes on his feet.  But he was happy.   You could tell he had been on the streets for a long time.  But he still had his dignity.  He didn't want to take without giving back.  

These are just a few examples out of many that I've experienced on the street.  The economic downturn can cause us all be feel less charitable.  Of course, we're all feeling it.  That feeling that, "I can't help someone else.  Some days it feels like we can barely help ourselves."  But is that really the case?  Like I mentioned, if we have a roof over our heads, clothing on our backs, food in our tummies, then we CAN help others.  Maybe we can't give financially, but do you have enough food?  Then maybe you can pack an extra sandwich one day a week and pass it to someone who is hungry.  Maybe you didn't get to eat that apple that you packed for your lunch?  The gift of a piece of fresh fruit is a blessing to someone who is living on the sidewalk.   Okay, maybe you don't pack your lunch.  Maybe you're out on a business lunch...how about putting some of your lunch aside in a doggy bag to share with someone on the street?  

The weather is starting to get chilly in the evenings.  Going through your closet you find a sweater or two that you haven't worn for a couple years.  It may be a designer label, but what good is it doing in your closet?  Wouldn't it be nice to share that with someone who has no sweater?  You see what I'm saying?  This may all seem really obvious to you, but when I talk to people about the homeless population, I hear lots of different opinions and some of them are very negative and judgmental.  And is it our place to judge?   Nope!

When you think about it, we are all vulnerable without the love and support of our family and friends.  Remove them from our personal equations and then think about what would happen if you didn't have them as your support net.  Then think about not having that support, losing your job, losing your home, and then maybe having a dependency problem on top of it all.   Life is not easy these days.  It's it's especially tough when you're robbed of your dignity by having to ask for food and money.  

I also realize that not all of you have contact with homeless individuals, but there are still shelters and food banks that could use our help.  With Christmas approaching, there are families that need help.  What about adopting a needy family (with your family) and providing groceries for them?  Donate to your local food bank, volunteer your time at a shelter.  Get involved with charitable giving.  At our church, St. Peter, we have all kinds of programs to help make our Thanksgiving and Christmas more meaningful.  We have our annual food drive where we provide turkeys and food to needy families in our community, we have a toy drive to provide toys for the children of domestic abuse in the shelter, and our annual blanket project has us all knitting and crocheting beautiful masterpieces to give to those in hospitals and cancer wards.  What about you?  There's so much to do.  And so much we can do.  But what we should never do is rob someone of their dignity.  It's only the giving that makes us what we are!

So whether you can give financially- and many, many, MANY thanks to those of you who so generously donate to our ministry and our homeless outreach - or you can give of yourself...the importance is in giving...from the heart! 

As we start this new season and gear up for the Thanksgiving and Christmas, let's all work together in sharing Christ's love, compassion and peace with ALL those that we come in contact with.

If you're interested in sponsoring one of our homeless outreaches, you can shoot me an email at anushnoor@gmail.com

The Jumper

I kept hearing laughter, loud talking, joking coming from my boss' office.   It was late afternoon.  I had just said goodbye to my boss.  So what was going on in her office?  I kept working.  I had an hour left til the end of the work day and too much to get done, so I didn't get up to go check.  But the noise went on, for a good 45 minutes.  And slowly -- as I subconsciously tuned into the conversations - I realized what was going on.

The reason for this gathering?  It wasn't a party.  But it was a "disconnect".  They were gathered there for a better look at the jumper.  Because we're on the 19th floor, we have a view of the city and the freeway below.  In the nine years I've worked in downtown L.A., I've seen several like him climb over the bridge railing and  think about ending it all.  People kept coming and going into the office. And I heard "is he still there?", "anything yet?", "wish he'd jump already."  There were jokes made, someone suggesting "music to jump by."  More laughter.
I am so  hurt and saddened by this display of insensitivity by my coworkers.   As I sat at my desk trying to focus on my work, I couldn't.   I thought about the crucifixion, and how the people taunted Christ when He was on the cross.  I thought about how alone He must have felt and how alone the jumper must be feeling on the bridge.  From the corner office I could hear them calling him a "loser", an "idiot", a "nut".  

We hear so much about bullying in schools.  What about bullying in life?  That's what was going on.    Sure, the victim wasn't right there, but it was that same taunting, and the banding together of those that were doing it....with a common goal.  To mock someone less fortunate.  What would have happened if instead they showed caring and concern for this poor man in his time of need.  What would have happened if they came to his aid and helped him off the bridge?  But it was probably that very mocking that brought the jumper to this point in his life.  Maybe by others, maybe by his own inner self.

As disappointed as I was though, my deepest disappointment was in myself.    I didn't participate in that corner office gathering, but I am no better. By choosing not to say anything, I allowed it to go on.    I thought about what I could have done.  I wouldn't have been able to go down to the street level and deal with the jumper, but I could have gone into the office and expressed how I was feeling and maybe that would have made some of them think about their comments and actions.  So why didn't I?  Did it have to do with fitting in?  A little.  But it was more that I felt it just wouldn't make a difference to them..or to the jumper.  But the truth is that it did make a difference.  And because I did nothing, it made a difference to me.   Try as I might to work, I couldn't.   I couldn't stop thinking about it.

Eventually, the police got to the jumper and convinced him to step off the bridge.  Thank God.  The show was over, and everyone went back to work.

That night, I said a prayer for the jumpers of the world -- those that are lonely, the taunted, the bullied. I prayed that God show His love to them through us.  I prayed for the bullies...that God open their hearts and fill them with compassion and love toward others.  And I prayed for the silent - that God would open our mouths to help us to speak out for injustice.  And give us courage to do what was right. 

This morning, at my desk, I received an email from my boss.  It was a mass mailing to the entire office.  A photo from the previous afternoon accompanied the email - "Here's a view from my office, " it said.  "What's new with you?" and a happy face.

This time I did speak up.  I wrote her an email response, and told her how sad the whole thing made me...what had gone on in her office...and how this man on the bridge was someone's child..someone's son.  I told her how disappointed I was in myself for not speaking out.  And I continued, "...and so I needed to write this in response to your email...because staying silent didn't sit well with me."

I received a response: "thanks for the reminder that I need to be more sensitive. I know that was not your intention, but I need to work on that for myself."

I need to work on that for mysef too.

Conversations about Underwear on Figueroa

About a month or so ago, I was heading toward my car on Figueroa after finishing up at work.  As usual, Bob was in his spot, sitting in his wheelchair, he greeted the passers-by with "Your hair looks nice," "What a game last night, huh?", and "I like your earrings."  I would say about 50% don't even make eye contact.  That's pretty good considering most homeless people on the street.  Bob is different.  He's likeable.  Very even tempered, and very complimentary.  That's his schtick.  That's Bob.  On that day, he was asking someone if they had seen Puss n' Boots.  He said that he thought it was a funny film and recommended that this man take his son to see the film.  "My son is 18.  He's not going to sit through Puss n' Boots."  To which Bob replied, "Well, I'm going to be 53, and I sat through it...and really liked it!"  At that time, I was approaching, and he starting asking me if I had seen the movie.  I told him I hadn't, but asked him when his upcoming birthday was having overheard his conversation.

"December 7!  I was born on Pearl Harbor Day,1958."  So I remembered.  For the past 6 weeks or so, every once in a while Bob would mention that he had an upcoming birthday, to which I'd say, "I know. Pearl Harbor Day, 1958."  Everytime I say this, Bob says, "Aw, ma'am...you remembered my birthday."  I've told Bob my name, but he calls me "ma'am" which I would hate from anyone else, but from Bob, it's okay. 

So yesterday as I passed Bob, I asked him what he needed for his birthday.  "Aw, ma'am, you remembered!...Well, I could use some pants, but I know a couple people that said they would get me some."  I asked about food thinking I could get him a gift card to Corner Bakery (I know he likes their chili).    But he said, "no, I have enough food...I get so much from people going by that sometimes I have to give it away."  So that was out.  Then he said, "Ma'am?  I could actually use some underwear though."  I said okay, happy to have a definite gift idea.  And then there I was.  On Figueroa, discussing underwear with Bob.  What kind?  Boxers?  Tighty whiteys?  What size?  And it struck me as funny as I was walking away because I was having this conversation about something somewhat intimate with Bob who is just really an acquaintance...but an acquaintance in need of underwear.  That evening, in Costco, I told my husband that I was picking up underwear for Bob.  "Who's Bob?" he asked.  "Bob, my friend in the wheelchair."  "Oh, okay."  Neddy know I have a soft spot for the homeless.    

Bob is 53 today.  It's Pearl Harbor day.  He has a long gray beard, long gray hair tied back in a pony tail.  He has one leg and sits in a wheelchair with all his belongings tied to it.   He has soft green eyes, and would actually be a handsome man if he wasn't so unkempt.  He's about the most positive man I've met.  Despite the adversity, he sits there every day as the world walks by, talking to whomever will carry a conversation with him.  When I ask, "How are you today, Bob."  He says, "Keepin' positive!  God is good."  He has every  reason to think the opposite.  Just last week when it got to be so chilly, I asked him where he goes at night.  He said that last night he spent the night on the floor of his friend's bathroom, and in his positive way said, "but it was indoors and out of the cold!"  That's how Bob is.  Always positive.

As I approached him today, he was talking to another homeless man who was standing close by.    I watched as Bob counted out money from his cup and gave it to the man.   The man looked at me and said, "I'm hungry and just need some money for food...for a burrito."  Bob was sharing his money with him, and I gave him the rest.  I've seen this many times before on our homeless outreach.  The sense of community and belonging of the homeless toward one another.  After the man had left, I handed Bob the bag with his gift.  I had wrapped his underwear six-pack in colorful paper and added a card.  Bob looked inside the bag.  "Aw ma'am, you remembered my birthday...and you even wrapped my present...and there's a card too?  And you always remember my name.  I appreciate that, ma'am, that you know my name." 

Makes you think, doesn't it?    The little things are what matter.  To someone who is "invisible" to the general populace, having someone know/remember your name is a big deal.  Having someone even acknowledge your presence is special.  And I suppose having them remember your birthday is just icing on the cake! 

Happy Birthday Bob.  May your life be filled with the beauty that you so easily see in all of us!

A Song, a Dance, and a Blessing

This past Monday evening was our monthly homeless outreach to the Skid Row area of downtown Los Angeles.  I think we're in our fourth year of the project now: feeding and clothing our friends that are down on their luck.  Over the course of the past year, we've noticed more and more people living on the streets.

Each of us that attends has our own stories to tell of our experiences.  Since we are spread out between the three cars that we take, we each hear the stories of those that wish to tell it; that is, if we wish to listen. 

"We all live under the same sky, but we don't all have the same horizon." Konrad Adenauer

On a dark street, we were passing out soup.  We had a lot of clothing this time thankfully, so we were able to provide warmth right before the cold weather.  It's raining today, and I'm thinking of our friends out on the street.  I hope they are staying dry.  As I was handing out water and snacks, this very nice looking older gentleman came up to me.  I asked him if he could use some snacks, maybe some soup, dry, for the next day.  He was appreciative, taking the soup and snacks in a bag for later.  He gave me a sweet smile and said, "I am an artist.  You should check out my YouTube video.  Singing.  That's the talent that God has given me."  I was interested and asked his name.  "My name is Octive Fellow Soul."  He spelled Octive for me.  : )   He told me he was homeless and trying to get discovered.  He told me to check it out again.  "My name is Octive, I'm a fellow, and I have soul!"  And he turned a corner and was gone.  So I came home and checked it out, and to my surprise, there were several videos of this Octive.  All taken by people who he had come across in the street, from L.A. to New York.  All taken by people whose lives he had touched to the point that, like me, they wanted to put it up on the web and share it with others.  Watching this video brings me joy.  Here is a man who is given a talent and despite the bad breaks in life, despite the fact that he has no home, he is staying positive doing what he loves best.  Singing, entertaining.  So here is my friend Octive (as seen on YouTube) singing Goody Goody. 

The evening wore on.  People were truly grateful for us being there.  At one stop, Suzie helped a woman who was challenged trying to keep herself clean while living on the street.  She was self-conscious and concerned about her hygiene.  I imagined the difficulty of that -  going from having a bathroom and a shower in my home, to living on the street where the only place you could go to bathe would be the local shelter. 

Our final site was the most crowded.  Imagine pulling up to a street where people are living on the sidewalk, some in tents, others in boxes, still others on just the concrete itself.  There are people that know the ropes, and there are those that are learning.  As soon as we pull up, the people come up to the cars.  We yell out, "HOT SOUP!  WATER!", the tailgate opens, the thermoses come out, and people line up.  I end up handing out snacks and water to those that are waiting, while the others serve the soup, or fit people with clothing and shoes, blankets, etc.

I noticed this one man sitting on the sidewalk.  He was wearing some shorts and a tshirt.  He had no shoes.  He was barefoot, but was airing out his socks.  He sat there staring into space.  When I approached him with some hot soup and water, he seemed confused.  He didn't speak English and tried to tell me something in what sounded like Korean.  I didn't understand but motioned to the clothing car where he could get clothing.  He brightened up as if he remembered something he could say to me in English..."Ayana kissue"   He was smiling!  I want to kiss you?  Is this what he was saying?   He was smiling and started following me to the car.  Okay Awkward...I jokingly turned to him and said,   "Uh, no thanks!"   He sat back down to his soup.  A few minutes went by and I went to get him a pair of socks.   I put it down next to him.  The light went on.  He nodded.

Over the next 15 -20 minutes, we tended to many many people.  The clothing car was super busy as people were in need of warmer clothing now.   By the time were were about to leave that site, I looked at my friend on the sidewalk.  Was it the same man?  There he was....Dancing!  He was so happy!  He had received a pair of jeans, socks, a pair of nice black shoes, and a new shirt.  Not able to contain his happiness, he was dancing in place, showing us his new outfit. 

"We are not human beings on a spiritual journey. We are spiritual beings on a human journey." Pierre Chardin

There are many stories like this.  So many lives that are in need.  And so many that just need a connection.  Someone to talk to.  Someone to share their talents with.  Someone who will listen.  We've been doing this for years now and it never gets old.   The need is so great, and not only for the homeless but for us who need to be there because it helps us to walk in their shoes.  We don't approach our homeless brothers and sisters out of pity, but as a sense of family and of community.  We are all related in this family called humankind. 

"Our humanity is a poor thing, except for the divinity that stirs within us." Francis Bacon

Team In Her Shoes

It hasn't been a week since we walked in the Avon Walk for Breast Cancer.  And although I haven't thought about going for a walk yet, it seems that all I can think about is that feeling we all got by participating in the walk.  The hope.  The energy.  The positivity of a collective of concerned people walking toward a common cause.

As I told you all, the closing ceremonies were very emotional for me.  It was only 4 months ago that I was diagnosed with breast cancer, and there I was, at the closing ceremony, preparing to walk in with the 256 survivors who had participated that weekend in walking 39 miles!  Some had been long-time survivors.  Others had chemo coursing through their veins!  Some were just starting their protocol...others were waiting for test results.  We were all survivors.  It was so empowering.

I felt it.  And my family and friends felt it too.  And it was right after the ceremony that we decided to walk in next year's Avon Walk - Santa Barbara 2012.  As a team.  Team In Her Shoes.  Seven of us signed up that very day!  But I don't want to stop there.  I know there are a lot of us out there who want to do it, but don't know if they can.  Let me tell you -- You CAN!! 

Last night, I set up a Facebook page.  And we are setting up a registration meeting/team meeting on Friday, October 28.  I have some venue ideas, and I'll announce the location as soon as I have a definite location; but for now, please mark this date and join us.

If you've ever thought about doing the Avon Walk, join us!  Even if you feel like you're out of shape, but would like to "some day" be able to do it, join us!  Maybe you're thinking, you'd like to, but the fundraising is daunting, join us!  The fundraising commitment per person is $1800 plus registration.  BUT, walking with Team In Her Shoes, we'll do it together.  We'll train together (we have a year!), we'll work on fundraising strategies, we'll get in shape, and we'll work toward a common cause....bringing an end to Breast Cancer and walking In the Shoes of those who are battling cancer!  

What if you physically can't walk but you'd like to participate?  We can use CREW members too!  Crew members work the weekend of the walk at the rest stops, directing traffic, food service, security.  We can have CREW In Her Shoes!  Many more men walked this year with us....why not.  Did you know men can get breast cancer too?  Yep!  So think about it!  Men, Women, Daughters, Sons, Sisters, Brothers, Friends, Family.  Let's get a big group together and DO THIS!

Together we will have an amazing time.  Together, we'll raise funds and awareness.  Together every step of the way!!

Please save this date: 
Friday, October 28, 2011
Time:  7:30 p.m.
Location:  To be announced
You'll get more information, watch video, hear about the walk, learn about training....and meet the 2012 team members (and hopefully sign up to join us!!)  The more the merrier!!

If you know of a person/business that would like to sponsor us -- our powerful Team In Her Shoes -- please leave me a comment or email me:  ahnoosh@ca.rr.com 

We're just starting up...and signing up! 
Please "LIKE" us on Facebook:  "Team In Her Shoes"

I look forward to meeting all of you.  Let's walk together to make a difference.  Let's be the change we'd like to see in the world.  None of us is as powerful as ALL OF US!!

Just a General Catching Up

The year is half over, and time is speeding by.  After my last post, I was thinking about the ordinary everyday things which, thankfully, life is full of.  A lot has gone on since my last post, but there haven't been any major milestone events...so I thought I'd just do a general catching up and share what life has been like.

Healthwise:  I continue to heal and get stronger.  I'm walking now, 3-4 miles a day (about 5 days a week).  This weekend I am upping that to 5-7 miles.  We're training for the Avon Walk in September where we need to walk 39 miles in two days.  So walk we shall....to toughen up the tootsies.  My entire abdominal area and new breast are still numb.  This past Saturday we were at the beach.  I was sitting in my sand chair and thought I'd lie on my tummy for a while.  WRONG.  I don't know why I thought I could do it.  I guess it felt so "normal" to be spending the day at the beach.  One flip on the tummy and I knew it wasn't a good idea.  Just a little reminder that things are still healing inside.

My last doctor's appointment went well.  Scar tissue on the side near the underarm....nerve damage from the lymph node dissection so still no feeling in the upper underside of my arm, but generally, things are healing well.  Admonishments for "no lifting", "no yoga," and "no ab exercises".  The tram flap scar is healing well.  We will complete the second part of the breast reconstruction in late August as an outpatient procedure. 

I've been doing a little work around the house.  I've always wanted to create a living space on my front porch, and this past weekend made that a reality.  We bought a couple yellow adirondack chairs, and I potted plants in colorful planters and picked up a little table, and voila, we have a place to sit, read, have coffee, relax on the weekends or warm evenings.

The garden is growing.  I've added butternut squash, roma tomatoes, nasturiums, more green beans.  I've been picking handfuls of chinese peas daily.  The weather is almost too warm for them to continue, but the vines are over 5 feet tall.  That's amazing considering I planted them prior to my surgery, only 8 weeks ago.

On the Pomegranate & Eye front, some exciting news!  I ordered a kiln!  Yep, after months of researching what type of kiln and what type of capability, I bought a Paragon SC2 with a bead window (so I can expand to beadmaking at some point).
The new kiln will enable me to work in copper and bronze metal clays.  Along with the kiln I ordered the clays, and tools I'll need and some supplies.  I'm really excited about it and can't wait til they deliver. 

Many of you have asked about the drawings for the book I was working on for the Eastern Diocese of the Armenian Church.  I'm happy to say that work on that is going to resume starting next week.  I had to take a break because of all the health issues, but I'm finally able to sit in one place long enough to get started on it again.

And then mixed in with all that we celebrated our 7th anniversary on the 3rd; enjoyed family on the 4th; and celebrated my husband's birthday on the 5th!   So there you have it.  Celebrating the ordinary.  Life is good and everyday is a blessing!

"Life is what happens to you while your busy making other plans."    John Lennon

Dignity, Homelessness and the Amazing Chain

Dignity.  The dictionary defines it like this:

–noun  1. bearing, conduct, or speech indicative of self-respect or appreciation of the formality or gravity of an occasion or situation.

I witnessed this dignity in a homeless man this past Monday night, and as we start this Thanksgiving/Christmas season, I keep thinking about him.  And about the way things fall right into place, just the way they are supposed to. 

This past Monday, we visited our homeless friends on the streets of Los Angeles.  Our monthly homeless outreach has been going strong for three years now.  With the decline of the economy, we are seeing even more homeless on the streets.  As usual, we were equipped with soup, water, snacks.  We had a full pickup truck of clothing, and by a kind donation we also had some emergency mylar blankets and ponchos.

We pulled up to our first stop around 8:00 p.m.  4th Street and San Pedro.  There's a small encampment there of people living in boxes (if they are lucky to have a box), and on the sidewalk itself.  It's cold.  A man came up to me and asked if I would have a pair of shoes for him.  He said he had shoes, and if we didn't have any, that was fine.  But his shoes were canvas, and it had been raining....  No worries.  I set out to the back of the pick up to find him some shoes.   Digging around, I found a pair of leather high top shoes.  I held them up.  "Can you use these?"  He looked.  He smiled.  He said, "Those look great.  I hope they fit.  I won't take them if they don't though.  Let me try them on."  I grabbed him a pair of socks, and he set out to try on the shoes.  In the meantime, I asked him if he could use some soup?  an emergency blanket?  how about a poncho.  "I'm good," he said.  "I have everything I need.  But thank you."

The shoes fit.  He was smiling....and stomping around in the shoes.  Then he did something very few on the streets would do.  He handed me his canvas shoes, and said, "I'll donate these to you.  They're worn, but someone else can make some use of them.  Oh, and I'd like to give you a donation."  When I thanked him but said it wasn't necessary, he said, "Oh, no, I know it's not necessary, but I'd like to.  It's important that we help one another.  And your group is here helping us."  He pulled out $2 from his pocket and handed it to me with thanks.  "God bless you guys.  And Happy Thanksgiving to you."

Wow.  I was touched by his manner.  He looked like all he had was the clothing on his back and the new shoes on his feet.  But he was happy.  He didn't want to take, without giving back.  Yet he was worn.  You could tell he had been on the streets for a long time.  The man had dignity.

The evening went on.  At each of the stops we fed and clothed.  I met a man that couldn't speak, and we had a little fun as he would point at various items of clothing and try to "ask" me for certain items.  I'd get a thumbs up if I guessed correctly....and a smile.  I had a great time with our crew, two of which were first timers.  At each stop though, I would try to find some feet for the canvas converse shoes that were donated so generously.  But no takers. 

At our last stop, the lines for food were huge.  Hungry people lined up as our crew poured hot water into the cup-o-noodles.  At the pick up we were busy finding clothing for people.  We never have enough warm clothing, the need is so great.  But we actually did have enough where everyone who approached us got something.  When the lines had died down, we announced it was time to pack up.  That's when Selin, our newest crew member, asked me in Armenian, "Do you think you have some shoes and socks for this man?  He's barefoot."  I looked to find a man, standing in shorts and a tshirt waiting for soup. 

The shoes!  I ran back to the truck. It was almost empty, but the shoes were there along with a few pairs of mismatched socks.  By the time I returned the man was gone.  Luckily, Aram had seen where he went.  He was back in his box.  The two of us went to this man's home and knocked on the box.  He peeked out and we offered him the shoes and socks.   And they were perfect.

When I think about how it all worked that night, I don't know why I shouldn't expect it to work out that way from the beginning.  Through God's grace, all things are possible (and probable).  The man that donated the shoes at the first stop had a reason for doing so.  The fact that there wasn't a match for them at our other stops was also meant to be.  The barefoot recipient of the shoes was supposed to be in line, barefoot.  And Selin, being new to our ministry, was supposed to be right where she was, distributing the soup and taking it all in, in order to take compassion upon this man and ask that we might have shoes and socks for him.    It's an amazing chain this way.  Everyone has something they can give:  be it a smile, a thank you, a pair of shoes, a compassionate heart, a kind word, an ear to listen. 

And what happened to the $2 donation?  At our church we have a prayer box.  Each Sunday, prayer requests are read during the divine liturgy and we pray for those mentioned.  A donation was made with the $2 for the Hungry and the Homeless of our city.  My prayers are with them for sure.

This Thanksgiving, I am thankful for the opportunity to learn some very valuable life lessons from those who have nothing but their dignity.  They have so much.