30 July 2011

At Least There are Sunflowers

I haven't blogged in a long while.  I've gone back to work, back to jewelry making, I'm starting to go back to my drawings now, and life in general.  I've been walking....and walking....getting ready for the Avon Walk for Breast Cancer which is now only 50 days away.  Eeeps!  You know that Ani graduated, but since my last writing, she has taken her NCLEX (nursing license exam) and passed and is now a full R.N.  My son Nareg turned 30 - a wonderful occasion to see how my little boy has grown into a man (and a kind, compassionate one at that!)  I really have a lot to be thankful for.  But then there's the garden.

There's a lesson to be learned here, and I'm trying to figure out what it is.  Remember how adamant I was about digging and getting the garden ready before my surgery?  That was a little over 3 months ago.  I worked for a week, digging and weeding, turning in new soil and planting.  It was all set.   And for a while it was good.  The peas did well (see previous blog posts), and I harvested quite a bit, but the weather got warmer and the plants maxed out. 

But what about the other stuff?  The tomatoes, the squash and cucumbers?  The peppers and green beans.  Pffffffffttt!  I don't know what happened.  Whereas my sister Susan is sharing mammoth sized zucchini with me, I have not had one.  My coworkers are bringing in bumper crops of tomatoes, I have maybe picked a handful of golf-ball sized thick-skinned tomatoes.  I had one really good green pepper...and just picked two half sized red ones (I left them on the plant thinking they'd get bigger...they just got red...:::shrug:::).  One eggplant.  One small yellow squash.  No cucumbers.  I have watered and weeded, and put in my time.  So what's up?  No clue.  I do know that I have a possum that comes out at night and if I don't harvest my tomatoes in time, he'll help himself to them...but that's not it.

What I DO have though, are sunflowers.  They are just getting ready to bloom.  I had planted them around the border of my garden (so they wouldn't block the sprinkler spray and deprive my veggies of water).  They are magnificent.  Tall and strong, turning their faces toward the sun.  A reminder of God's beauty and artistry.

I have an army of them.  A source of joy when I go out and look at my otherwise failing garden.  I have been thinking about this lately, because yes, I am disappointed with my garden...but how can I be when I have something so amazing right there in front of my eyes?

And I thought about what I've been through over the past several months.  Before being diagnosed, I had worked on getting healthy.  Losing weight, eating right, exercising.  I had put in my time to make myself a healthier person.  Despite all this effort, I was diagnosed first with colon cancer, and then with breast cancer.  I underwent surgeries.  I recuperated.  I followed doctor's orders.  And I, thank God, am well.  I may not be "thriving" yet...but I'm doing okay.  Giving off a tomato here, and a pepper there (metaphorically speaking, of course.)  But still, I'm doing okay, y'know?  But oh, the SUNFLOWERS!  They're the blessings in my life:  my children, my family, God's presence, my ability to help others, compassion, peace, and love.  They are more than thriving.  They are starting to BLOOM.  This is what is bringing me JOY.

I am thankful for all the parts of my garden.  The ability to even have a space to have a garden.  The strength that I enjoy to work in the garden.  The blessing of having clean water in pipes that flow to water my garden.  And even for the disappointments of failed crops.  And I'm definitely thankful for the SUNFLOWERS!  Reminders of God's presence in my life and the gifts that I am so richly rewarded with.

1 comment:

anikohar said...

The sunflowers are beautiful mommy! :) xoxo