So I thought about it. I mean I did the Avon Walk. I set out to walk 39.3 miles in 2 days and I did it. So that was a success. I thought about the fact that I was walking with my brother, and my sister-in-law by my side...and my daughter, sister and my husband were working on crew. My younger brother was texting me while I was walking for updates. And I thought about how blessed I am to have a close relationship with my family. Was that a success? For me, yes, although I think success usually is goal related, and has a positive outcome or objective met, right? I thought of my past history with breast and colon cancer. My objective was to fight it...and I did. I was walking and I am healthy. So I am successful when it comes to that. So all was good. I mean, I just thought about it. A lot. What is success? What makes us successful? Do you always have to reach your objective to be a success? This type of thing.
So last Wednesday, I went to my WW meeting with my questions in hand. But at weigh in, after walking over 40 miles that weekend, I got to my weigh in to find my weight up 1.8 pounds. Really??? I mean after walking over 40 miles this past weekend. After all the training. And then to add salt to the wound, my friend who started the same week as I did back in February, hit her 40 pounds lost...and I just felt so low and defeated. All this negative speak was going on in my head. How come I can't have that success? Seriously. There was no way I was feeling successful. And the thing is, that I work so hard at it. Tracking my intake, drinking my water, staying active, eating healthy when my highly successful friend doesn't do any activity and manages to consistently have the scale heading lower and lower every week. So I'm sitting there all disappointed, and trying to hold it together and be happy for my friend. But inside, i'm just feeling really sad.