Showing posts with label garden. Show all posts
Showing posts with label garden. Show all posts

04 August 2011

In Praise of Sunflowers

It always blows me away how beautifully intricate sunflowers are.  Typically we see the sunflowers that are sold at farmer's markets or florists, but homegrown sunflowers are different.  Out of a small 1/2" seed, grows this 10 foot tall flower.  The seeds on this one aren't developed yet, but I love looking at the pattern in the center.  My eye makes rings out of the little seeds.  I love how the petals are kind of floppy.  Like those long, skinny, balloons, they are twisted and soft.  I also appreciate how this flower does so much for so many.  You can see the holes in the leaves.  The ants love to climb the fuzzy stalk and eat the tender part of the leaf.  As the flowers mature and the seeds develop, the birds come around...and so do the squirrels.  Last time I grew sunflowers, I came home from work to find them all toppled.  The squirrels, in trying to reach the seeds, had climbed and pulled them down.  The good part was they had knocked the seeds out, and into the ground.  They had planted themselves that year, and come springtime, I had new sunflower seedlings.

As sad as it is when they are finally "gone", it's a beautiful thing.  This beautiful flower supplies me with so much joy in its majesty.  They are always my favorite (and most successful) thing to grow in my garden.

30 July 2011

At Least There are Sunflowers

I haven't blogged in a long while.  I've gone back to work, back to jewelry making, I'm starting to go back to my drawings now, and life in general.  I've been walking....and walking....getting ready for the Avon Walk for Breast Cancer which is now only 50 days away.  Eeeps!  You know that Ani graduated, but since my last writing, she has taken her NCLEX (nursing license exam) and passed and is now a full R.N.  My son Nareg turned 30 - a wonderful occasion to see how my little boy has grown into a man (and a kind, compassionate one at that!)  I really have a lot to be thankful for.  But then there's the garden.

There's a lesson to be learned here, and I'm trying to figure out what it is.  Remember how adamant I was about digging and getting the garden ready before my surgery?  That was a little over 3 months ago.  I worked for a week, digging and weeding, turning in new soil and planting.  It was all set.   And for a while it was good.  The peas did well (see previous blog posts), and I harvested quite a bit, but the weather got warmer and the plants maxed out. 

But what about the other stuff?  The tomatoes, the squash and cucumbers?  The peppers and green beans.  Pffffffffttt!  I don't know what happened.  Whereas my sister Susan is sharing mammoth sized zucchini with me, I have not had one.  My coworkers are bringing in bumper crops of tomatoes, I have maybe picked a handful of golf-ball sized thick-skinned tomatoes.  I had one really good green pepper...and just picked two half sized red ones (I left them on the plant thinking they'd get bigger...they just got red...:::shrug:::).  One eggplant.  One small yellow squash.  No cucumbers.  I have watered and weeded, and put in my time.  So what's up?  No clue.  I do know that I have a possum that comes out at night and if I don't harvest my tomatoes in time, he'll help himself to them...but that's not it.


What I DO have though, are sunflowers.  They are just getting ready to bloom.  I had planted them around the border of my garden (so they wouldn't block the sprinkler spray and deprive my veggies of water).  They are magnificent.  Tall and strong, turning their faces toward the sun.  A reminder of God's beauty and artistry.

I have an army of them.  A source of joy when I go out and look at my otherwise failing garden.  I have been thinking about this lately, because yes, I am disappointed with my garden...but how can I be when I have something so amazing right there in front of my eyes?

And I thought about what I've been through over the past several months.  Before being diagnosed, I had worked on getting healthy.  Losing weight, eating right, exercising.  I had put in my time to make myself a healthier person.  Despite all this effort, I was diagnosed first with colon cancer, and then with breast cancer.  I underwent surgeries.  I recuperated.  I followed doctor's orders.  And I, thank God, am well.  I may not be "thriving" yet...but I'm doing okay.  Giving off a tomato here, and a pepper there (metaphorically speaking, of course.)  But still, I'm doing okay, y'know?  But oh, the SUNFLOWERS!  They're the blessings in my life:  my children, my family, God's presence, my ability to help others, compassion, peace, and love.  They are more than thriving.  They are starting to BLOOM.  This is what is bringing me JOY.

I am thankful for all the parts of my garden.  The ability to even have a space to have a garden.  The strength that I enjoy to work in the garden.  The blessing of having clean water in pipes that flow to water my garden.  And even for the disappointments of failed crops.  And I'm definitely thankful for the SUNFLOWERS!  Reminders of God's presence in my life and the gifts that I am so richly rewarded with.


17 June 2011

The Post-Op Garden, Goals, & Miracles




My Garden - Six Weeks Post Op
 Back in April, with my upcoming surgery looming in the future, I set out to dig up and plant my garden.  Remember?  It took days of cleaning up the plot, pulling out the devil grass and weeds, adding new soil, watering, planting.  I knew that in the weeks to come, I wouldn't be able to dig.  Or bend.  Or use my arm.  My goal was to plant my garden before I had my mastectomy...so that all I'd need to do in the days after surgery is turn on the sprinkler and water.  And it happened.  This is a photo of my garden today...six weeks post op.  Time flew by.  A goal was set six weeks ago.  Now I'm looking at a garden that is thriving, growing, full of life.
Back in March when I got diagnosed with breast cancer round two, I knew there were things that I'd need to do to prepare for surgery.  I set another goal. 


Ani & I on graduation day - Six weeks post op

With Ani's upcoming graduation in June, I needed to make sure that I was well enough to attend this very important milestone.  In order to make it, there were things I needed to do: set my goal in my head and tell myself (okay, convince myself) that YES, I would be there at graduation with the cancer behind me.  Once I convinced myself, I needed to make it happen by making sure my healthcare team knew my intent.  So everyone involved knew I had a graduation to go to.  I think this helped tremendously as the team then became involved in my goal.  Not only were they trying to remove cancer from my body, they were working to get this mom to her daughter's graduation!  And it happened! Thank God, I am thriving. 

Like my garden, there are changes that are taking place every day.  Some are too subtle to see, even for me.  I am six weeks post op from breast cancer.  I am healing and will continue to heal for months to come.  My incisions are closed.  The bruising is almost all gone.  There is still soreness, especially under my arm and numbness throughout the breast and abdomen.  Phase two of reconstruction will happen in a few months so I'm not finished yet.  But I'm back to work.  I'm starting to be able to bend again (watch out weeds!)  And we are walking...training for Avon Walk for Breast Cancer in September (39 miles in two days!)

The other day, as I stood looking at my scars, I was commenting to Ani on what an amazing job my surgeon did.  Her comment to me was, "You know what's more amazing?  Your body's ability to heal.  The surgeon did the surgery; but it's your body that's doing all the healing."  Never thought of it that way. 

All of life is a miracle.  The idea that you can put a seed in the ground, water it, and with the help of good soil and sunshine, it will grow to a beautiful flower, or a juicy tomato.  Then there's the miracle of our daughters and sons, growing from babies to insightful, loving, caring adults.  The healing of our bodies.  The fulfillment of our dreams.  All of life.  Miracles.

Post Op Peppers


Post Op Peas


02 June 2011

Memories of Grandma - or - Who's in the Mirror?

My grandmother lived in a duplex on the corner of our block.  She was a survivor of the Armenian genocide, a strong woman of faith, a proud American citizen, and an avid reader.  Se loved to knit, crochet and do needlework.  She also loved to garden.   I think because of the horrors she witnessed during the genocide, the beauty of her garden, the colors, the "life" it held were important and therapeutic to her.   She had a small vegetable garden in the courtyard of her duplex where she grew swiss chard, tomatoes and parsley.  While she tended to the garden, I would play waitress with her, pretending to take her order on an ivy leaf that was my pretend pad.   

She lived on the top floor of the duplex.  When you walked into her home, you would stare right at the stairs that led up to her living space.  Her house smelled like a mixture of palmolive soap and onions, and it was always cool in temperature in the grandma's house sort of way.   As a little girl, one thing that I remember are the large gardening shears that were always on the second stair of the staircase.  I remember how huge and sharp they looked, like old rusty giant's scissors.  My grandma would use these scissors to edge the grass of her front yard.  Not the garden itself, but the grass that grows in the sidewalk sections. 

She took a lot of pride in her garden.  Her knees were bad, and she'd sit on the sidewalk, one knee extended, one knee bent, and she would snip the grass where it hit the edge of the walkway, scooting herself down the plot as she worked.  Her flower garden was beautiful.  She grew fuschia flowers, the pods of which my brother and I would love to "pop" as they hung down in clusters.  She loved showy dahlias and roses, and most especially she loved to grow oriental poppies.  She would harvest the seed pods of the poppies and collect the seeds to put on her boregs and fresh baked bread.  Once she shared with me that when she and her friends were children in Armenia, she would work in the poppy fields, harvesting the pods for opium.  The beautiful red, ruffled blooms brought back happy memories of her childhood.

I've been thinking about my grandmother a lot lately.   When my life feels like it starts to get overwhelming, I think of her and her quiet strength, her faith, and her inner peace.  She had a soft face, a broad nose, her hair was long and always coiled into a bun that was pinned up at the nap of her neck.  Her stockings were knotted at the knees.  Plain.  No make up.  Basic.  Despite my health issues, compared to her life and what she had to endure as a survivor, raising a child as a single widowed mother, my life is a piece of cake. 

Lately, when I look in the mirror, I've been seeing my grandmother.  When I was young, I looked like my father; as I grow older, I look like my mother; but there are certain times, when my hair is pulled back, when I have no make up on, when I'm just plain ol' me when I look like my grandmother.  And last month, when my brother and sister came to visit me in the hospital after the mastectomy, I heard them whisper it to each other, "She looks like grandma!"  My ears heard it...and I was glad, because I thought I had been imagining it.

And the similarities don't end with looks.  I too like to knit and crochet, I love to read, and  I find a great peace in spending time in my garden.  Although I haven't had luck growing poppies, I do love to grow my vegetables and flowers.  Like her, I have bad knees and can't squat, so I do sit...and bend just like she used to. 

Yesterday, my sister Susan came over to help me weed the garden since I'm not able to pull and use my arm too well yet.  Two sisters-in-law, but truly more like sisters, we worked together - Susan turning over and loosening the dirt so that I'd easily be able to pick out the grass/weeds.  We cleaned up the garden together, talking, sharing while we worked.  And then just like my grandma, I picked up my gardening shears and trimmed the edge of the grass against the concrete.  We finished, and came into my cool house -- was it me? or did it smell like palmolive soap and onions?  I went into the bathroom to wash up, and there she was in the mirror.  I look like my grandma.  It's a nice reminder of someone that I miss and hold so dear.

25 May 2011

The Garden, Doing Too Much Too Soon & Silver Poms

Yesterday was a good day.  I walked two miles in the morning, came home and sanded and shaped the silver pomegranates, was pretty good about my non-snacking goals (except for the afternoon Oprah sunflower seed extravaganza!), and walked a third mile when my brother came to visit.  It was bra day, and it felt good to have that extra support, to feel normal again.  Today, not so much.  : (   By evening, I was out of my clothes and into my jammies by 6:00.  Just needed to do nothing -- after I torch fired the pomegranates (there's always something to do).  It's hard to explain.  I wasn't "sleepy" tired, but my body was tired...and complaining.  My abdomen (which I didn't really feel had the right to complain since all we did was walk!), was sore...like I had done sit ups all day.  My new breast, after being loosely bound, was tender and achey.  I haven't been taking pain meds for over a week now, but it warranted meds.  "I" didn't feel like I was doing too much too soon, but I guess my body had another opinion.

So this morning, I decided to forego the walk.  Actually, my friend Sugar asked if I'd like to meet her for a walk in Montrose this evening, so I'll get in a short walk (emphasis on "short").  So it's a lazy morning (as far as exercise is concerned).  I slept in til about 8:30.  Made coffee and wire brushed the pomegranates that I had fired last night, and they are happily tumbling in the tumbler in the kitchen for the next few hours. 

My mom is coming over today.  She's bringing lunch.  Despite my insisting that I could fix us something here, that I had food, that I was able to get up and about, and that I am trying to eat healthy, etc.  "I'll bring something light."  God bless her.  Our time together is cherished.   The plan is that we will watch the final Oprah show together.  : )

And finally, this morning, I went out to put the sprinklers on the garden.  It was just a few short weeks ago, pre-surgery, that I was turning the soil, adding organic mix to my terrible dirt, watering, prepping the garden and planting because I KNEW that I wouldn't be able to dig for a few months.  Well, the garden is doing really well, and I thought I'd put up some pics to show progress.  I have tomatoes, zucchini, yellow squash, chinese peas, green beans, cucumbers, bell peppers, eggplant and a sunflowers around the border of the garden.  Nothing is harvestable yet, but it's looking good.  I need to weed (as the crabgrass is coming in again, but I can't bend.  So maybe I can do it with that little "grabber" tool that my mom bought me??  I wonder?

Before you check out the photos though, I just wanted to add a request.  I know there are a lot of you that are reading my blog.  I really appreciate all the great comments on Facebook, Twitter, etc.  I was wondering if you might consider following my blog?  Just because I like knowing who's reading (nosy that I am.)

Okay, here are the photos.  Have a beautiful day today....and remember to listen to your body and don't do too much!  : )

The garden monsters (notice the crabgrass peaking in)
The Chinese peas are starting to climb
I have bell peppers forming!


The full view, sort of.  with the new pepper and tomato plant that I'll ask Neddy to plant this weekend.  Notice the sunflowers that are about 5" high all the way down the right and in the front bottom.